No more motions

Christian duty checklist:
1) Eagle's Nest homeless ministry-check
2) Daily devotional time- 1/2 check
3) Prayer for strength in the midst of fasting-check
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.
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Still somehow I don't feel...good. Christianity is more than a checklist of "good" things. I say this from daily experience. So many times I find myself trying to be a person God can love. You know the type, nice and friendly, responsible, respectful and respectable, etc. The only problem is I could never be worthy of God's love. Honestly, I am a manipulative, deceptive, selfish person.

Yet, He loves me. And He's growing me a little bit more everyday into the person He wants me to be.

That's what it's about, the love of God/Jesus/the Holy Spirit. Despite my flaws as a person He loves me, and wants to be with me. How could I not praise a God like that?

So, I know what I must do. I must be because God loves. Not to earn brownie points because they don't exist here. Besides, that is a self-centered way of viewing my relationship with God, because I'm making it about what I am, and what I do. If I wake up more in love with God it will transform all that I do.
There. I want to love God more.