Moving

Not from my house, haha
For anyone who has chanced upon this, I'm moving from this blog to a new one
http://confuero.tumblr.com/
I intend to blog more, also. See you there ;)

OMG

Hi.
So I like taking pictures. For a while my lifelong dream was to own a digital camera. One Christmas, my parents bought me a digital camera. My reaction went a little something like this: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


That camera got broken. Fast forward some amount of years and I buy myself another digital camera...!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I get picture taking friends with their snazzy cameras called DSLRs, and I find out mine is called a Point and Shoot (P&S). No big. 
Anyhow, my uncle asked me what I want for graduation. After some thought, I realized that I want to take my picture-taking to the next level, so I considered asking for a DSLR. I decided tonight to look and see what kind of price range that would be getting into. Don't want to be that psycho niece who takes advantage of gift opportunities. Anyway, I looked. My reaction was such:
o.O   (Canon website)


o.O   (Nikon website)


o.O   (Sony website)


o.O   (Ebay-I got desperate)


How the Heck does anything cost so much? 
Needless to say, a DSLR will remain on my list of future things to get when I get a job. A really really good job...

Consider your thoughts

What do you think about? How many thoughts wander away from you? 


Do you fantasize? What about?


Consider the idea that fantasies reveal what causes us dissatisfaction. We think things should be different, and in our minds conjure what would be ideal.


I dare to say that fantasies are not biblical. Follow what I'm saying. I'm talking about the self-satisfying, I would be so much better off if this were that, why can't this happen to me kind of fantasies. Why? Because we don't see, or refuse to see the beauty of God in every circumstance and instead pine after greener grass. Does not Romans 8:28 say that all things work together for  good for those who love God and are called according to His purpose? It does. And in Isaiah 55 God tells of His higher thoughts and ways. Just because we don't understand or even like the way things are going for us doesn't mean that it's bad, or not of God. 


Now, that is not to say that as a Christian we should just accept everything thrown at us, that's ridiculous. What I'm saying is that in less than 'ideal' circumstance instead of retreating into the fantasy world of our selfish minds we should be seeking God. Learning about Him, asking for guidance in the tough time, and diligently seeking to learn whatever He's teaching. Life to be lived well does not involve satisfying every desire of our heart. It's knowing God through His Son Jesus Christ and finding out that true satisfaction does not come from things that we can see that perish under the sun. True satisfaction comes from God.

'Worship' music

Maybe I'm the only one with this problem, but do you ever find that when listening to a song that used to move your heart when it declared how awesome God is...just doesn't do it for you anymore?
And rather than being okay with that, you try to manufacture this emotional response, because if you get all emotional then you really mean it...

That's what I'm struggling with. What really bugs me, though, is that I know that approach to worship music (or anything God-related in general) is in fact not God worship, but self worship. I get so caught in how I feel, and what I'm doing, and if I do this what does it mean about me, when the whole time God is demanding that I forsake myself and get lost in His awesomeness. A particular song may speak very specifically about my life for a time, but Jesus is forever speaking.

Consistency

So I'm reading through the Bible, and am in 2nd Chronicles. At first I didn't expect much of it because the Chronicles literally document what the kings of Israel and Judah did. Nothing 'super-spiritual', right? 

WRONG

There is so much to learn about God and how He treats us, His people, and how often we turn away from God.

Today in chapter 16 I finished the story of Asa, king of Judah. In the preceding chapters we saw how great a king Asa was, and how in God he defeated armies sooooooo much bigger than his, and how he led the people in worshiping God. Then we come to chapter 16, and the king of Israel is coming up against Asa, and Judah. Asa, then pays the king of Syria to 'handle his lightweight', to take care of Israel for him, and Syria obliges them. Hurray, no more trouble from Israel, right? 

WRONG

God sends a prophet to Asa to rebuke him, because instead of crying out to God, who helped Asa defeat a much larger army, Asa relied on the king of Syria. Not only was this a slap to the face of God, but it also prevented God from exacting judgment on Syria because Judah was now in treaty with them. God therefore declared through the prophet that Asa, Judah would now have wars (they had had several decades of peace).

Well what did Asa do next? Cry out to God and ask for forgiveness? Humble himself in repentance, and entreat God's mercies? Nope. That would have been too easy. Asa got mad. Like, really mad. So mad that he threw the prophet into prison and inflicted cruelties on other people. Later in his life Asa contracted a disease in his feet that was severe. Even then he did not ask God for help, but instead sought help from many physicians. Then Asa died.

Surely this isn't that same king who defeated a massive army in the name of the Lord, who religiously reformed the kingdom of Judah by removing all of the foreign idols, tearing down the high places, and rebuilding parts of the temple of God. This can't be the same guy who removed his own mother from the position of queen because she made an idol of Asherah. No way.

But it was.

From this passage I see that living for God is a daily thing. Just because I serve in the church now, am striving to be holy now, doesn't mean that 20 years from now I am guaranteed to be doing the same. I will make mistakes, but when I do and God is telling me, "Hey, Amanda, you shouldn't have done that" how will I respond? Will I be indignant, or will I repent? This passage showed me that it's never too late to turn my back on God. The Bible as a whole shows me how it's never too late to repent and come back to God.

Sold out

I want to be like Hezekiah.

Just One?

2 Kings 17: 35-36
"The LORD made a covenant with them and commanded them, 'You shall not fear other gods or bow yourselves to them or serve them or sacrifice to them, but you shall fear the LORD, who brought you out of the land of Egypt with great power and with an outstretched arm. You shall bow yourselves to Him, and to Him you will sacrifice.' "

So, I know the commandment about making God number one in my life. "You shall have no other gods before me", it says in Exodus 20, but here in Kings it's talking about having gods after God, also. But what does that matter? If I have God as my number one, how does looking to other things like money or other people secondarily change anything about our relationship?

hmmmm...

Well what if I was dating a guy, Steve. He was the most fantastic person I have ever met. He's kind, caring, and compassionate. He loves me in spite of my flaws, and isn't just trying to get in my pants. He's gone through every Aunt, Uncle, cousin, sibling, and parent just to get with me. He is my number 1 guy. But then, on the side, I Bob, whom I like to spend Thursday evenings with, because he's a good cook. Or on Saturdays, I like to cuddle up with Billy and watch the football game. BUT every other day of the week I'm Steve's girl. Clearly Steve is more important than Bob, and Billy combined, since he has 5 days, and they have 1 day each. 

Is that not still a cheating heart?

If this is wrong on the dating scene, how much worse is it in the spiritual realm where God has literally overcome all of heaven and hell just to be with someone as undeserving and wretched as I. And I'm wondering why I shouldn't have any gods after Him?
He's everything.